I see You coming and I run the other way
I hide from the truths You want to write on the other side of my heart
When You look at me and ask me where I have been I just don't know what to say
Where can I hide from You? Where can I run where I don't hear the promptings in Your voice?
You push me to the very last edge of myself
I would love to believe that in these things my heart hasn't already made its choice
But long ago I said goodbye to that kind of wealth
My head hurts trying to figure out the details of Your master plan
And I can't. It doesn't make sense. It never makes sense!
Sometimes people look at me strangely and it causes me to wonder who I am
Somehow I think it was easier just riding the fence
I find myself more consumed with You and less directed by what my plan was
Yet I know one day soon I will wake up and find myself in awe of You and wondering once again how I ever felt like I knew You before
I guess that is just what God does
When you push away your boat from the shore
Obedience means saying yes even when it puts me in an awkward place
Walking forward without removing the blindfold from my eyes
Maybe risking embarrassment. Vulnerability. Exposure. Grace?
Inviting in the kind of access to my heart I sometimes despise.
Your dogged perseverance in my life has not gone unnoticed
I am overwhelmed by Your pursuit of me
Sometimes I get so frustrated, I am afraid I have missed
The point of Your serenity
Laying down, laying down, laying down and surrender
I'm not sure if it ever comes naturally
Perhaps one day, Abba Father, I will be overcome
By the bond that exists between You and me.
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